Day 11- Compliments and Requests

Day Eleven
Thursday

"I will do not 'do not weep' for not all tears are an evil." - J.R.R. Tolkien

The Outfit

Clothing: Purple V-neck, white jeans, black socks.

Shoes: the zippered ones. I think they were tied too tightly- my toes feel a bit crunched.
Hair: Loose, tucked behind my ears.
Jewelry: Silver faerie ring and two charmed necklace and dangly purple earrings.
Makeup/Accessories: None.

"When a person is born we rejoice, and then when they're married we jubilate, but when they die we try to pretend nothing has happened." -Margaret Mead

Bracelet

In case anyone's been wondering about my the bracelet: Yes, I once described my typical set of jewelry as my faerie ring, two charmed necklace, and aluminum bracelet. It's been strangely missing, hasn't it? I raved about the perfect trio that those three were and then basically ditched one of them. Well, there's a simple enough reason. I've been wearing long sleeves, which would cover the bracelet, and taking it on and off every day is starting to twist it out of shape. Which I'd like to avoid, for obvious reasons.

"No one ever told me that grief felt so much like fear." -C.S. Lewis

Compliments

I've been getting quite a few compliments on my nicer wardrobe during this challenge. I'm fitting in more and people like that. Besides that and zetta  more importantly, I feel more confident in some of my better clothing. It's not really prissy, for the most part,  but it's unarguably nicer and I feel good in it. Thank, you everyone! Especially Mrs. Amy Farrah Fowler, who stopped me in the hallway to tell me she thought I looked nice.

Though I didn't chose these items because they looked better, I chose them to make things difficult for myself. But that's besides the point, eh? Because I still ended up with a totally unique, thought-provoking, bubbly experience that I'm incredibly thankful for. I know I'm been bitching about the 621 as if it's totally slaggerific but it's really not. It can be frustrating at times and seems pointless at others but the whole time, it's still been a great time. So thank you everyone, and thank you 621!

"If you're going through hell, keep going." -Winston Churchill

My brother- photographer unknown

Requests

Okay. So this is going to be a little less peppy than one of my typical blog rambles. I apologize for that in advance but now you've been warned. Skip it, if you want. Unless you're Mrs. Amy Farrah Fowler, then you can't. But you know what it's about anyways. So it's a simple enough request, on one level, but rather hard on another (like this challenge!) and I don't mind it in the slightest (I am going through with it, after all), but I do think it deserves a mention.

For those following in my class, you all know we just started our "Deviance" unit, especially drinking, underage and otherwise. It started the last ten-fifteen minutes of class today. Lucky me, I even got to be the example of the girl going to a party and drinking alcohol. It's not the first time- in fact, the last time it happened was only a few days after what I'm about to tell y'all about and I stormed out of the Health class.

Anyways, so the drinking unit started and I went up to Mrs. Amy Farrah Fowler's desk and told her that if I ran out of class during this unit, it wasn't because I was trying to be rude or didn't care, it was because I didn't want to barf or cry in the middle of class. And, Mrs. Amy Farrah Fowler, who already knew the basics of what I'm about to tell y'all, told me I could leave whenever I had to, were it to be needed, because she's understanding like that.

And, as I told her while holding back tears after the rest of the class had left, this is my story. My mother, whom I do not live with (so don't worry, folks!) is an alcoholic. It doesn't affect me too much. After all, I don't spend much time with her and it's not like I respected her anyways. Besides, she's not the important person in all of this. She's just the one who gave me an early respect and fear of alcohol. I wasn't one of those people who assumed they were invincible. I've seen her stumbling around and sloshing wine everywhere and saying just absolutely stupid things.

And then, there's my half-brother, John. I found out about him in October of my 8th grade year. We emailed daily, he spent Christmas with my (it should have been his too!) family, and we talked a lot. He had been in the army, had been a 911 operator, and a sheriff. Basically, he was a great guy. He'd had a hard childhood and he'd overcome it- which I suspect is the reason he had a phoenix tattooed on his back. He got out of the army, at least for the time, and spent his time before entering the sheriff's office doing fun things. 

One day (less than a year later, a month before the last day of 8th grade), he and a bunch of this friends got together to swap stories and drink and stuff like that. He was 24 and I would assume his friends were all of a legal age. But that's besides the point. There came a point, early in the morning, that they decided to pass around guns. I guess just to show them off- John was always bragging about his guns. They were drunk by now, very drunk, and didn't think to make sure the guns weren't loaded and that the safety was on. And someone's beer-clumsy finger slipped and it went off. And killed my brother.

I don't know who did it- the gun was in his hands but that doesn't mean he did it, after all. Some people say it was suicide- which I disagree about. You just don't kill yourself in front of a group of friends. Right? I didn't get to the go the funeral and I never told my brother that I loved him. There was never a good time- now it's too late.

"Grief is the price we pay for love." -Queen Elizabeth II

Red Ribbon Week

Because of what I've already stated, I DESPISE alcohol. I... no. I just can't understand any of it. That and guns, but the latter comes up less frequently. Anyways, so this week is Red Ribbon Week, which is for ALCOHOL AND DRUG AWARENESS (all caps because it's that important). Last year the school magazine quoted me in their red ribbon week article. I still have the clipping of the part involving me. Here's one of the quotes I gave for the magazine article:

"People underestimate the likelihood that taking drugs can lead to serious concequences because they think those accidents will never happen to them"

"There is no grief like the grief that does not speak." -Henry Wordsworth

Tomorrow

Well, I was already going to wear the dark blue pencil skirt tomorrow so I could be as classy as possible on the last day of the challenge at school. But now that I'll be talking about John, I will be wearing the scarf he gave me to go with it (it's the same dark blue- which is funny because he got it for me because he thought it was purple, my favorite color) and his dog tag. Also- I'll probably wear my phoenix necklace (remember his tattoo?).

"The fear of death is worse than death." -Robert Burton

ave atque vale, frater (Latin: hail and farewell),
S. Dorsey. 6th period